Weekly Weigh In #4: Milestones A-Go-Go

This morning, I weighed in.  Here are the results:


I have lost 4 lbs. this week.  (Sweet.)


I have now lost a total of 20 lbs. in one month.  (Even sweeter.)  I have 80 lbs. to go before I am at my goal weight.


That means, for the record, I weigh 248lbs.  I am down from 268lbs. at the beginning of this saga.  (Again, so damn sweet.)


But, the truly amazing thing about this isn't just that I can do elementary level math (an accomplishment, trust me!).  The amazing thing is this:  I haven't been less than 250lbs. in YEARS.


I am more excited about this fact than I can adequately express!  It is a HUGE deal.  

When I think about this diet, and this new approach to food, I think about milestones.  There will be many moments along the way that are big... not just the end result.  Like the milestones in many European towns, they let you know how far you've come, and how far there still is to go.  So, here are a few things that are huge deals to me at this point - my milestones:


#1:  Today, while sitting in the doctor's office, waiting for my name to be called and trying my hardest not to let my blood pressure rise with the anxiety that comes on weigh-in days, I sunk into the plush leather sofa and automatically crossed my legs.  Just like that.  No plan, no active effort - they just - crossed.  It's important to note that I have not crossed my legs without thinking in recent memory.  Fat people just don't do this.  Add to the being fat part that I also have the world's worst knees, and crossing of the legs is not good for people with the world's worst knees - so I just don't.  I sit like a lady, ankles crossed, knees demurely together (hard to believe after the "Naked" post, I know...).  But I never cross my legs.  And today, I just did.  I almost cried when I realized what I was doing.

My backside is beginning to
disappear.  Amazing.

#2:  Another milestone can be seen in this week's photos.  While I find them to be horribly unflattering for a million reasons (including the harsh flourescent lighting), I now have proof of two things: horizontal stripes are never good on anyone, and my jawline is coming back.  I am so happy to see my jawline emerging again.  It's like that old friend from high school that you knew pretty well but mostly took for granted.  You didn't make them feel special, you just knew they'd always be around.  Then, after graduation, they go on walkabout in Australia for a few years and nobody hears from them again.  Only then do you miss that old friend.  Well, that's how I treated my jawline.  But now, it's coming back, and I can totally see it.  My head no longer has the distinct, rotund shape of a mango when my hair is pulled up, and I like it.  I like it quite a lot.  And I will never take my jawline for granted again.

In the photos I can really see how much
my face has slimmed down.  Wow.

#3:  The other milestone change is far from my face - it's at the other end of my body, in fact.  The shoes you see in these photos are black suede loafers from Target, that I recently got on the clearance rack for $6.  They are nothing fancy.  They are not a brand name, and nobody else wanted them - which is why they were on the clearance rack, I'd imagine.  It's what they are NOT that is amazing - they are not ultra-padded, seriously supportive, orthopedic, mail-order only, intensely-expensive-because-they-have-to-be shoes.  Those are the shoes of fat people. I own many of these shoes.  And now, I am now able to comfortably wear even the clearance rack shoes.  Not only will this make my suitcases lighter when I travel, but it will enable me to choose from a wider selection of adorable footwear than I have in a long time.  Carrying around 20 extra pounds on your body takes a major toll on your feet - and that's why the heavy duty shoes are a must for those struggling with their weight.  I now know that the lighter I get, the cuter my shoes will be.  That is an immutable fact.


I knew when I started this that some major things would happen - I'd get further away from diabetes, look better in my clothes, and feel more energetic.  I'd add years to my life, and light years to its quality.  I'd feel more confident, more self-aware, and set a much better example for my growing family.  And I'd even like myself a little more, which is pretty great.  I had no idea I'd start crossing my legs and wearing cuter shoes, though - and I certainly had no idea it would happen so soon.


Some of my milestones will be like my horizontal-striped shirt: big and obvious.  Some of them will be more like my new shoes: rather small and unassuming, and only fully appreciated by me.  But the great thing about milestones, both big and small, is that there's always another one around the corner, with a new destination written upon it.