Weekly Weigh In #6: Good news and bad clothes

I weighed in today.  Here are the results:


Weight:  243lbs.


Lost this week:  2lbs.


Total lost:  25lbs.


This is a surprise - I didn't think I'd lose anything this week because of my birthday dinner splurge, so losing anything was great.  Reaching a milestone is equally great - 25lbs. lost is a big deal!  I am now one quarter of the way to my goal, and it only took 6 weeks.  At this rate, I may be done with this process in less than one year.


This is also a week for updating photos - it's been two weeks.  These were taken hastily this morning with my iPhone as my sweet husband was rushing out to school, so they're a bit fuzzy.


I'm not happy with these photos, though - and it's not because they're low res or out of focus.  It's because, once again, I see myself wearing clothes that I thought looked nice - but now look awful to me.  In life, my shirt actually showed my waist off a bit more, and I looked less pregnant.  In the photographs, however, I look dumpy and large.  Great.  


I'd love to blame the people who make clothes for plus size women, but I really can't.  Nobody made me buy these, did they?  I am very aware, however, that when I find something that fits, as a fat person, it doesn't matter how it looks.  Sometimes the fact that it fits is all that I consider - and that is absolutely what happened here.  That shirt looks bad, and because I don't have to do it anymore, I won't make a bad choice again.  I'll only buy new clothes that look flattering or feature some part of my figure in a positive light.  And I definitely won't wear this shirt again soon.


Both of these things make me realize one big truth - reality is often not what it seems, because we create our own illusions.  I felt positive that I didn't lose an ounce this week, yet I did.  Likewise, I was sure that this outfit wasn't that bad - yet it was.  


There are many things in my life that are not as they appear.  My hair is brown, but there's a ton of gray in there that needs to be hidden.  My demeanor at the office is usually calm, even if I'm freaking out inside.  My house is relatively clean, but I haven't washed the kitchen floor in ages and it's not getting done anytime soon.  We all have these things, don't we?


There are also some things that are exactly as they seem.  I love the challenge of my job.  I am completely in love with my husband.  I'm obsessed with bad television shows and I desperately need a pedicure.  And I today, I am 25 lbs. thinner than I was only 6 weeks ago.